Dirty Little Secret #38

Dirty Little Secret

Dirty Little Secret is a weekly meme hosted by us at Under the Covers. Every Thursday we get to know other bloggers and our readers more intimately by asking them a question hoping to reveal their dirty little secrets.  We hope that you will all join us!
To participate in the meme all you need to do is:
1. Be a follower of Under the Covers.2. Create a post in your blog taking the meme image (code above) and copy instructions. 3. Answer the question we propose! This can be done in any way you like, post a video, write a post etc.4. Then add your link below.
Non-bloggers: We want to hear from you as well!!!  Let us know your answer in the comments! 
We hope you join us and let us know your Dirty Little Secrets!
This week's question:Shuffle your playlist and give us the first five songs that come up.

1.  Rammstein - "Stripped"
2. Nekromantix - "Last Night I Saved An Angel"
3. Kittie - "Paperdoll"
4. Mad Sin - "Holy Vacation"
5. Lords of Acid - "Kiss Eternal"

I'm a Bit Odd, I Guess...

Last night was kind of... Personally revealing night for me.

We were talking about weird things you've stumbled upon the internet. Then it went to what age you started looking at porn. Or what age you started playing with yourself. The topics were everywhere, but fun to talk about. Admit those weird images you've seen that you've never told anyone else and have someone relate to you.

Then I came to a startling realization.
I was looking at pornographic type images since I started going on the computer. So we're talking about the age of nine... I was searching google images of naked anime women from shows I liked watching. (Tenchi Muyo, X-Men, etc...) Eventually I stumbled upon DeviantArt, Harry Potter images...
I'm nine. I just know I like the images.
My family brings it up occasionally, but no one really knows how to talk about it. I blow it off as "I like the picture, it's pretty" because I don't know why I actually liked it. My grandparents told me they didn't like me going to such "bad sites", but I didn't know what sites they were talking about. I had no idea what I was looking at was "bad". (Looking back, yeah, I was incredibly naive.)

I spent 14-18 hours a day if I could on the internet, browsing fanfiction and fanart. X-rated was my favorite setting on fanfiction.net until they took it down. I remember a few stories with nothing but sex, but I didn't realize why I was reading it.
I was 12 or 13 and can remember grinding into my jeans because it felt good while reading an X-Men smut story.

I never masturbated.
I never learned how to, I guess. I never realized I was "supposed" to?

So I'm 22 now and I still don't really masturbate. I try, I try, and I never actually get a thrill. I never get satisfaction. I just... Feel like I should be doing other stuff.
I told Josh that I tried to masturbate two days ago and I couldn't. He goes "What were you thinking about?" My response, "Counting. I was bored." And he just gave me a stunned silence. Yeah... I was counting.

It's weird, I want to relax enough to enjoy it... But I can't seem to let go enough to enjoy myself, to use my imagination for my own benefit.

I test toys for fun, but I never really get anywhere but worked up.
I worked at an adult novelty shop, I can help others learn to get off, but can't seem to do anything for myself.
I love talking sex, about anything, but I can't seem to help myself.

So for now? I'm taking a break on reviewing and giving my opinion on testing toys (not that there was much before now...) until I can figure something.

A Minor Review of Sorts

Sorry for the lack of updating! There has been almost no blog activity, on any of them lately. I'm almost 100% positive no one actually reads this, but I do what I can because I love it...
I actually think I stopped posting as much because I started using it as an advertisement for EdenFantasys... And that's a shitty thing to think, it is my blog after all!

So anyway. We shall talk about the toys I bought for Valentine's Day.

The Vibrolady Fleshlight just... Was rather disappointing. I mean, the Fleshlight itself is fabulous... But the bullets? Bah. They weren't even worth putting in as replacement bullets in the cock ring; they were not powerful or worth the effort of putting them in the Fleshlight.
In fact, I was using one as a teaser and it kept shorting out. It took less than two times of turning it on and it shorted out. What the fuck? So I launched it across the room. It made a nice BANG against the wall and I haven't touched it since.

What's the Fleshlight made out of? Well, according to EdenFantasys it's made out of a material called "SuperSkin" which is made from "high quality materials covered by a series of US patents." Uh... What? And it's recommended to just "clean with warm water, NOT soap" which, to me, is still weird, because when was the last time just using warm water did anything but rinse something off?..
Anyway, so you just rinse it in warm water, air dry. When it's done air drying, sprinkle the insertion end with cornstarch and shake off the excess, should be good as new! Shouldn't even stick as much!

The cock ring... It came with two powerful bullets. The metal pieces in the cock ring for "added support" is just as nice. But as for the clit stimulation? Give me a break. You're trying to hump a duck beak, you can barely feel the vibrating of the bullet through it, and if you do, you're stabbing yourself with a duck beak. While this cock ring is great for keeping him hard and vibrating for him, it does almost nothing for me besides minor vibrations in his cock.

Valentine's Day Plans!

In the last few weeks I have made a few purchases from EdenFantasys. My boyfriend will be surprised for Valentine's Day!

With the giftcards I worked for through blogging and winning two giveaways (plus you can collect points by navigating through the site, using the search engine, even voting in polls, or making forum comments) I was able to spend almost $200 on things for Valentine's Day.

We're talking a Fleshlight Vibro Lady, a 4.5 fluid oz of System JO H20 Warming lube, a new fancy cock ring, and a High Intensity Vibro-Tease (anal plug... For me. Should probably state that now.)

I just ordered the warming lube and new cock ring with another gift card I received. (And some points redeemed into a giftcard...) While it may not get here until February 15th, I have hope that maybe it won't be that late.

Until then, apparently we are going to a little bakery to end lunch and then spending a night in, Josh took the day off work. =D
Then! February 15th I have a meeting with a Visual Communications director for school and pick up the shiny engagement ring! Huzzah!

Save the Date Romance Kits!

Today is February 1st. That means that Valentine's Day is under 13 days away! EdenFantasys is having a fantastic deal on Romance Toy Kits!

EdenFantasys present Save the Date Luxury Gift Boxes

You can pick up a complete Romance Kit and save yourself some money! So not only are you giving the best gift (orgasms), but you are also saving yourself some cash. Win-win for all involved, in my opinion!

For her is "a passionate kit that will indulge both toy lovers and toy beginners alike." This cute little kit includes an Insignia Alia (in three different colors: pink, rose, and black), Lelo Personal Lube, Kissaholic Lip Gloss, and Eden Toy and Body Wipes. 

The kit is $125: Alia is $114.99, Lelo lube is $12.99, the lip gloss is $15.99, and then Eden Toy/Body Wipes is $4.99. You save over $30 with this sexy kit!

The for him Valentine's kit is just as exciting! "Show him how much you love his sexy side with fun toys for solo play, or a naughty night for two!" Give him something to swoon over with the new Tenga 3D, Naughty Boy, Ride H2O Lube, and Eden Toy and Body Wipes.

This sexy kit is only $100: a $44.99 3D Tenga, $49.99 Naughty Boy (in blue or black), $11.99 Ride H2O lube, and the $4.99 Eden Toy/Body Wipes. This saves you over $15! Show your man you appreciate him as much as you appreciate yourself and all he does for you. ;)

There's even a "for couples" option. "This intimate kit includes fun and sensual toys guaranteed to bring couples closer together." Enjoy Valentine's Day (and every day ;) ) with the We-Vibe II, Lover's Body Paint, Pleasure Feather, ID Moments Warming Lube, and Eden Toy and Body Wipes.

For a (few) good nights worth of stuff, you only pay $110. The We-Vibe II itself is $99.00! $11.99 for the body paint, $6.99 for the feather, $9.99 for the warming lube, and $4.99 for the wipes... You're looking at almost $30 in savings.

EdenFantasys

This is an unbiased promotion. This post is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

A Better Inspection of a Revised WooHoo!

The Screaming O 'WooHoo!' that I wrote about in this article, about it snapping at the er... Ball vibrator part the first time we even attempted to use it...

So now instead I've got two awesome new vibrators...

A cock ring that actually works. Fantastically, actually.
The O-Joy (to be talked about later) was too tight. This one was fabulous. He reacted almost instantaneously to the vibrations, the appropriate tightness. He orgasmed at the end of it so hard, that his voice was raw at the end of it. ;)

The vibrator at the ball part was turned into a textured clit vibe.

The best part? I can interchange it with a cheap one-speed or three-speed clit vibe. So when these break, which they inevitably will, I can actually replace it! Until the cock ring part quits on me... Anyway.

He wants to try a working WooHoo! eventually...

The O-Joy has the best little nubbies ever. Even my boyfriend could appreciate them.

However. This may be of the same brand, Screaming O, it is so much tighter.

It actually cut off his ability to ejaculate.

It was rather depressing.

New Year Clearance Sale!

Huge Savings Here!

It's that time again! 

Eden Fantasys is having a HUGE New Year Clearance!

Save up to 70% on over 700 toys! 

Glass toys, silicone toys, rabbits, vibrators, eggs, cuffs, metal toys, butt plugs of all shapes and sizes, paddles... It's all there! Why not take advantage of this sale and make a sexy toy basket for yourself! 

After all, everyone needs a new toy for a new year!
Want to try bondage? There's discounted cuffs, blindfolds, and paddles!

Save up to 50% on brands like Lelo, Nexus, Fun Factory, and Extase with their Luxury Sale!

Glass Icicles brand dildos, Lovemoiselle Dorian's ceramic vibrator, silicone vibrators, aluminum toy for vaginal or anal stimulation...

Take up to 30% off on sexy clubwear and lingerie!

Or some sexy lingerie (or club wear) for all sizes!

Waist cinchers, corsets, babydolls, maid uniforms, bra and skirt sets, school girl uniforms, halter tops, key hole dresses, sexy robes...There's even metallic leggings (from a small to extra large) in a variety of outstanding colors!

Or go the economical route and save on multiple items with their deal packs! 

3 for $20, 4 for $20, or even 5 for $20.

You could make a sexy gift basket for Valentine's Day or any special occasion at a price like that!

Eden Fantasys

This is an unbiased promotion. This post is in compliance with FTC guidelines.

Cock Ring Rant

I haven't reviewed a toy in what feels like forever... So here's a rant about toys for you.

January of last year brought a lot of new, fun toys for me to play with for free from work.
I got a Neon Junior G-Spot Softee (review here), a thing of Wet's 4-in-1 lubricant (review here), a Screaming O O-Joy (product information here), a Screaming O Woo Hoo (product information here), a bottle of Sliquid Organics O Gel (product information here)... It feels like there might have been more... But it's been a year and I forget things easily.

Anyway, back to the main thing. After a year of not using any of that stuff (in fact, I threw out the Neon Junior for just being a shitty toy and I've never tried the Sliquid Orgasm Gel because I'm allergic to everything under the sun)... I finally busted out the cock rings.

The O-Joy was fantastic. Absolutely amazing. But it was too tight on him. It cut off just enough flow to prevent him from cumming all together and just made him incredibly irritated. He loved how much of a response I got from it, but all in all, he was just irritated by the end.

The Woo Hoo was something else we wanted to try. He liked the idea of the vibrator stimulating his balls at the same time. And it was a bitch to get the bottom piece around his balls. Eventually, he was trying to get it around them and it just... Snapped. The first time I go to use it after a year of having it, and it snaps. -_- Ugh.

In the good news, we now have a cock ring that should do the job and not cut off circulation or semen flow. It's a huge bullet vibrator, so he gets enjoyment out of it, too. And I got a nifty little textured bullet sleeve.

If the top half of the Woo Hoo works out well, we have a new cock ring. If it doesn't, I continue my search for the "perfect cock ring."

EdenFantasys Giveaways

Following EdenFantasys.com on Twitter has benefited me tremendously. I'm always in on giveaways, information, latest articles... Following their counterpart, Eden Cafe, also benefits me. Tips on cropping photographs, giving the best review you can, more giveaways... (Both of those links go to their Twitter pages.)

EdenFantasys does a lot of things, really. They can be more than just a sex toy store! There's giveaways, articles, forums... There's also Eden Gives Back, where people can promote their clothing drives, AIDS awareness, relief funds, supporting the troops... The link shows you everything Eden Gives Back accomplished in 2011.

Right now you can win the Joplin Intensity from EdenFantasys! An incredible new rabbit that also provides electrostimulation to provide orgasms while strengthening your pelvic muscles.

(Picture from EdenFantays giveaway promotion.)










Of course, that's not the only giveaway EdenFantasys has to offer right now!

Purchase any OhMiBod product from EdenFantasys site and you automatically enter into their Feel the Music Valentine Sweepstakes while their products are 25% off.
First prize is an iPod Touch and Freestyle W.
Second prize is a Club Vibe 2.0H.
Third prize is a Naughtibod.

Now go! Follow them and win some nice things for yourself!

EdenFantasys

This is an unbiased promotion. This is in compliance with the FTC guidelines.

TruePleasure's Giveaway

I won (second place in) another giveaway!

True Pleasure's hosted another lovely giveaway through Babeland, found here.

I got a choice between Picobong's line of the Kiki Vibe, Koa Ring, Honi Vibe, and the Ipo Finger Vibe.
I went ahead and chose the Koa Ring.

I can't wait get this in the mail! =D

Which reminds me... I owe you a review on the Sqweel and all that jazz...